I get a lot of parents who've completed my Easy Tiger Parents Programmes
tell me that their partner/spouse is really thankful and grateful to me for
the difference that my programme has made to their lives, relationship, and
children's lives. Nothing makes me happier! I am here to serve in the best
way that I can and that is helping parents make a difference to their
lives!!!

One parent go 2 jobs in 7 months; is very very happy and is now in her dream
job and career of choice!

Even with the recession as bad as it is, parents leaving my Easy Tiger
Parents Programmes are still getting jobs www.jennifermcleod.co.uk

Great source of info

Fine tuning my calendar of events re parents and self harm. Events are open
to individuals, parents and professionals
http://ping.fm/GKg0i

Reach your own decisions and follow them. Get facts and info from others if
necessary, without disclosing your purpose

Leaders make decisions quickly and change them slowly

Tell the world what you intend to do but first show it!

We need a party that can provide real help and guidance for our children and
young people

It is said that 22,000,000 votes won't have any bearing on the results in
this general election

I wonder how many parents have had to make alternative childrcare
arrangements because their child's school was closed for the elections in
the UK?

Did you know that in the UK 2 women a week are killed by domestic violence?

Equally shared parenting as an enlightening approach to childrearing
http://ping.fm/hYLI1

Equally Shared Parenting (ESP)? Are your parenting roles shared equally
within your home?

Good morning to all those feeling inspired and a very good morning to those
in need of some inspiration right now!

I have been dealing with a situation and on 2 separate occasions I got a
page from an inspirational book that confirmed what I needed to do

Isn't it amazing that you always get what you need when you need it?

One of the parents on Supernanny admitted at the end of the show that
"there's nothing wrong with the children; its us the parents. We need to
work together". Love it! That's exactly what I do! Work with parents as a
point of change and not with the children who, in my opinion are simply
reacting to the environment within which they are in. Fix the environment
and the children will respond accordingly.

Meeting this morning to discuss arrangements for a Health Day in June 2010
in West Bromwich, West Midlands

We all want to belong. If parents are not emotionally available, children
will attach themselves to the next best person. If this fails, they will
attach to a stranger showing signs of meeting this need.

'Have you ever wondered why you are expected to do the impossible, achieve
the unattainable or overcome the insurmountable? Very simply because you
can! Unfortunately we are not always aware of how magnificent we are' Iyanla
Vanzant

'The more that we can give young people opportunities to meet with and
observe at first hand, how sensitive, caring parents treat their offspring,
the more likely they are to follow suit' John Bowlby

'Children who develop a secure attachment to mother are those who, during
early infancy, are held longest in a tender and loving way' Ainsworth

Last few places left Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course. Book Now

http://ping.fm/v2hNf

Do you wonder why and what drives young CHILDREN to kill? More on this
coming real soon!

I have updated my self harm blog www.stepup-international.co.uk

Do you let fear stop you in your tracks? http://tinyurl.com/kojutv

I trust all those celebrating Vasaiki yesterday had a fabulous day!

Good morning to you all and a special good morning to all my contacts

Get the winning formula here http://tinyurl.com/kojutv

Few places left on Psychology of Self Harm Training Course

http://ping.fm/u2BfH

Britney spears denies self harming
http://ping.fm/b1Ipp

Still thousands of children stranded abroad due to restrictions on flights.
Bet their happy taking extra days off school & parents not!

Had visit to dentist this afternoon. Now the pain really begins!

I have got a fantastic FULL PAGE editorial in The Voice weekly newspaper
regarding self harm. Well pleased with it! Check it out

Just been told that I am in The Voice newspaper this week. Haven't seen the
article yet. Let me know if you see the article and what you think

I wonder which UK political party will win or come up trumps for families
and children?

Had a good work out in my make-shift gym in my garage this morning at
06.15am. feeling energized!

Still places left on Psychology of Self Harm course
www.stepup-international.co.uk
Book now to secure your place

Divorced? Daily Mail writer needs your help www.jennifermcleod.oc.uk

Request from a Daily Mail newspaper writer - needs your help

below is a request from a Daily Mail newspaper writer. Can anyone help with this? Please let me know and i will get you connected. thanks

"I am a feature writer at the Daily Mail and have a very tall order for an article I am researching. I wondered if you might know anyone who would be suitable and willing to speak to me. I am looking for a woman who has been divorced twice, leaving her raising two children with different fathers. We would like her to talk about about the practicalities of arranging two sets of access visits, the complicated Christmases and the awkward questions in the playground. We can obscure children's identities, but the subject would need to be named and photographed. If it helps - I can offer the interviewee �300 and a professional photoshoot, with make-over (if she likes that sort of thing!). I know it's a very specific request, but any help or pointers you can offer would be gratefully received."


Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!


With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6lf3gj

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

Born To Win! Success Strategies - EBOOK. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/66hovs

Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
Creator of Born To Win! Programme for Young People™

E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
E: youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk
www.stepup-international.co.uk
+44 (0) 121 551 1668

I just updated my blog www.stepup-international.co.uk

Thanks Marry for your kind words and encouragement. Will do
www.jennifermcleod.co.uk

You're not a failure if you don't make it. You're a success because you
tried! Anon

Your playing small does not serve the world! Marianne Williamson

Communication with Your Elementary Age Child by
Denis Waitley
http://ping.fm/otmId
&id=1240

"Success is not to be pursued; it is to be attracted by the person you
become." Jim Rohn

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

Had a great Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour course today working with
'Her Majesty'. That's Her Majesty's Young Offenders!
http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

Last day of preparation for my second Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour
Course with HMPS prison services tomorrow http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

Delivered psychology of self harm and Behaviour course to therapists and
counselors on Saturday! A much needed course! http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu hey
are getting more and more referrals of young people self harming

Websites promoting self harm are making my job so much harder
http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

Still got some places left on the Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course
http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

Got some for lunch time! Something else to look forward to today!

Had a fantastic smoothie last night courtesy of my eldest son. He called it
a 'power smoothie' to boost my iron content: raisons, apricot, coconut milk,
pasticcio nuts, apricot juice. Hhmm yum!

Just finalizing my revision of my Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour
manuals http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

Short exercise this morning - 06.30.

Just had a massive bee in my office! Don't know where it came from! I guess
it's a good sign that spring is truly on its way!

Or are they just attention seeking? http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

Are children and young people who self harm just copycats?
http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

17 year old on Jeremy Kyle show yesterday - 8th time pregnant! 7 previous
miscarriages due to drinking and taking drugs

Dr Phil interviewing parents who argue in front of their children and
touches on the aftermath affects on the children in their adult lives

Only 8 Places Left on The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19
May 2010. Book your place now to avoid disappointment
http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

Time to get on with my preparation for my two upcoming Psychology of Self
Harm & Behaviour Courses http://tinyurl.com/yff6vyu

Self harm is on the increase in the UK. Children as young as 5 years old are
turning to self harm as a way of having their emotional needs met. This is a
very sad state of affairs!

A big thank you to Tony Burgess of AHA! (Academy of High Achievers) for
giving me some useful nuggets to help me with my blogging experience

Good morning to all those who have connected to me across the networks and
at such speed! Have an enjoyable day!

Just opened my post mail marked "confidential & restricted" from HM Young
Offenders Institute that I will be delivering Psychology of Self Harm
training to next week. Interesting!



- - - - - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.jennifermcLeod.co.uk

Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

Thoughts on chef John Rankin butchery lessons in schools where pupils get
real life experience of butchery to help them learn about animals and where
they come from?





- -

A 10 - 15 minute exercise each day is better than no exercise at all. For
parents needing energy to keep up with their children, have a go at doing
just a few minutes of exercise each day and notice the difference in your
energy levels



- - - - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

Good morning all.



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

This is one of the messages that I received for Mothers Day today.
http://tinyurl.com/64oevy

"A mother has strengths that is amazing. She is Gods love in action. She
looks with her heart and feels with her eyes. She can handle trouble and
carry heavy burdens. She holds happiness, love and opinions. She smiles when
she feels like screaming. She sings when she feels like crying, cries when
she is happy and laughs when she's afraid. Her love is often unconditional
and everlasting. There's only one thing wrong with her: she sometimes
forgets what she is worth..to all mothers out there, this is a reminder of
your worth and how much you are loved. Have a good and blessed Mothering
Sunday".



- - -

A very happy 'Easy Tiger Parents' Mothers Day to all celebrating Mothers Day
today. Enjoy!



- - - -

Do you know of a Parent Support Advisor? How effective are they in bridging
that gap?



- - -

Nearly two-thirds of English schools now have parents support advisors
working with them to bridge the gap between school and home



- - - - - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

Connecting with Easy Tiger Parents Graduates from previous programmes to see
how well they have progressed since experiencing the Easy Tiger Parents
Programmes. Heard some great progress so far!



- - - -

Connecting with Easy Tiger Parents Graduates from previous programmes to see
how well they have progressed since experiencing the Easy Tiger Parents
Programmes. Heard some great progress so far!



- - - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

Got another YOT (youth offending team) client from London for Psychology of
Self Harm & Behaviour Training



- - - - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

Off to a meeting in Derby



- - - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

How resilient are children, really?

http://tinyurl.com/64oevy



- - - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

Going to Derby tomorrow morning.



- - - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place or find out more about
our Coaching and Training Courses and Workshops



Easy Tiger Parent SystemT

It's Ok To Be A (Working) ParentT

Born To Win! Programme for Young PeopleT

Easy Tiger Parent Programmes for TeensT

Step UP! to LeadershipT

Step Up! To Your ConfidenceT

1:1 Coaching or Group Coaching

Weekend Retreats

Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today!

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

'When you really go for what you want, you are helping more people than you
realise.'

Jennifer McLeod



Step Up! International Ltd, Inspirational House, Friary Rd, Handsworth Wood,
B20 1BB



Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





If you no longer wish to remain on our mailing list, please send a blank
email with 'unsubscribe' in the subject header.

Unbelievable what I heard today about a parent who has re-kindled an
unhealthy old relationship!



- - -



With Inspirational Blessings

Jennifer

Jennifer McLeod; BSc (Hons) Psych; NLP Pract; Chartered MCIPD; Dip.LC;
Advanced Reiki ll



Author of Born To Win! book series

www.borntowin-book.com

http://tinyurl.com/kojutv



The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course 18-19 May 2010, Birmingham.

Last year we were oversubscribed and many people were still enquiring about
this course even after the event.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**
Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email info@jennifermcleod.co.uk





see my latest blogs at www.Jennifer-McLeod.blogspot.com &
www.youngpeople-jennifermcleod.blogspot.com



Have you been LiBERATED yet?



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





Contact us on Tel/Fax: +44 (0) 121 551 1668; mobile +44 (0) 7957 687 036 or
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The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour

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Jennifer McLeod



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Jennifer McLeod



NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!





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spent a fair part of yesterday dealing with copyright infringement of my Born To Win ebook. that was not nice!

a contact in London interested in a service level agreement for my Born To Win Programme for Young People & Easy Tiger Parents Programmes

got another delegate sign up for my Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour course 18-19 May 2010.

sorting out and updating my networks

How Resilient Are Children Really?

How Resilient Are Children Really?

When a crisis or traumatic situation occurs we often hear people say something like “he/she will be fine. Children are very resilient. They will pull through it.”

Yes children and young people will “pull through” it but at what cost? At what cost to themselves? At what cost to society?

Let’s consider for a moment an adult experiencing a similar or the same traumatic experience, e.g. bereavement or marriage break up. How would the adult react to the situation?

They may have experiences such as:

• Numbness
• Being or feeling dumbfounded
• Feeling isolated
• Become angry
• Become aggressive
• Sullen
• Lash out at others
• Become excessively busy in an attempt to block the memories of the trauma/crisis
• Talk excessively
• Blame themselves for what happened
• Blame others for what happened
• Take on self destructive behaviours to cope with the situation (e.g. drugs, alcohol, self harm, abusing others etc)
• Being Fearful
• Begin to experience panic attacks
• Become tearful
• Take time off work
• Ask for compassionate leave
• Get depressed


Children are Humans too!

This list is only a minor sample of some possible ways that ADULTS react and cope with a crisis or traumatic situation. Given that children and young people are Humans too, aren’t they? Why then do so many adults think that children will be ok by simply leaving them to get over it by themselves? That their resilience will make it all ok?

Children and young people experience the same emotions that adults do when faced with trauma, except in some cases their emotions are camouflaged by “childish” behaviour because ……….they are children!

This does not mean that the underlying emotions that have driven them to behave in these “childish” ways have disappeared. This is their way of dealing with the trauma; they simply act out.

A child experiencing a trauma or crisis and who suddenly starts to fidget or talk excessively in the classroom or become sullen could very well be mirroring the behaviours of adults experiencing trauma. You will have undoubtedly heard of the sharp increase in self harm in the UK with young people, including the increase in suicide. Have you asked yourself what has driven these young people to these measures of coping?

Internalised Behaviour

If a child or young person is not given an opportunity to deal effectively with their emotions relating to the crisis, they will internalise the situation in a lot of different ways, especially self blame or self hatred and sooner or later we, society, will see and experience the result of that young person not receiving the REAL support that they needed at the time because they were deemed to be resilient enough to “pull through” it.

These same children are likely to be some of the ones labelled by society as yobs, thieves, hoodlums, no good or those exhibiting “inappropriate” behaviour and have been given ASBO’s (Anti Social Behaviour Order).
Some adults, including the medical profession, think that not talking to their children about the crisis/trauma will mean that the young person will forget about it. Wrong! The affects of the situation remain with children and they deal with them in different ways, which adults may label as childish or inappropriate behaviour

An author on self harm had a best friend who died when she was 7 years old and the author’s parents and doctor thought that it would be best not to discuss the trauma as she is likely to ‘forget’ about it in time. The author’s way of dealing with the situation was to internalise the sudden death of her friend by blaming herself for surviving which resulted in self harming behaviour for many years including as an adult.

In NLP we have a saying: “Perception is Projection”. That is, what you perceive in others is what you are projecting on to them. I have a very clear and distinct example of this projection experience from one of my managers many years ago, and it is one that I will always remember.

So please, as adults and as a society, let’s do a lot less labelling and negative projection on to our children and young people and lets do MORE of offering REAL help when they need it most. My belief is that children are born with “clean slate”. It’s society that teaches them how to behave!


Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6lf3gj

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

Born To Win! Success Strategies - EBOOK. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/66hovs

Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
Creator of Born To Win! Programme for Young People™

E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
E: youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk
www.stepup-international.co.uk
+44 (0) 121 551 1668

Self Harm is on the Increase, or is it?

Contacts and new customers alike are amazed at the extent of self harm amongst young people and that the age at which children are self harming is getting young er and younger.

What is going on here? Is it that all of a sudden all these young people and adults have just decided to self harm or is that this is a situation that has been around for many decades but people are more willing to discuss it now and seek help now.

Before they may have been ridiculed or sectioned. Today, there are different remedies, though many professionals are unsure as to how to deal with and treat someone who self harms, and that also includes the medical profession.

What are your thoughts?

Is self harm a new fad?

Is it more acceptable now to talk about it in public?

Share your thoughts here.

Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/kojutv

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

Born To Win! Success Strategies - EBOOK. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/66hovs

Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
Creator of Born To Win! Programme for Young People™

E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
E: youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk
www.stepup-international.co.uk
+44 (0) 121 551 1668

The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course

The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course

24 November 2009

Do you often wonder.....?

• Why men and women who self harm can't just get over their past and move on?


• What's stopping them from moving on?


• What it means that adults are self harming or still self harming?


• What about the elderly who self harm?


• Is self harm the cause of their circumstances and experiences or a symptom?

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour Course taking place 24 November 2009, BIRMINGHAM, UK.

BOOK your Place NOW! Just a few places left. Book now to avoid disappointment

Email: info@jennifermcleod.co.uk or telephone/fax +44 (0) 121 551 1668

Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6lf3gj

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

Born To Win! Success Strategies - EBOOK. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/66hovs

Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
Creator of Born To Win! Programme for Young People™

E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
E: youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk
www.stepup-international.co.uk
+44 (0) 121 551 1668

Get Selfish by Jennifer McLeod

In this Issue:

¨ Welcome from Jennifer McLeod
¨ Schools & Other Newsletters
¨ Mobile Phone Directory launches next week
¨ Featured # Article: Get Selfish
¨ What’s On?

Welcome from Jennifer McLeod

Hi All,

And welcome. How are you all out there?

It seems a while since my last blog. I have missed writing them and being in touch with you, however, please do keep sending your comments and feedback.

For the last few months I have had back to back Easy Tiger Parents Workshops, Born To Win! Programme For Young People Workshops and of course, The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course in May 2009. My last Parent Workshop is in two weeks and I am definitely looking forward to taking a much needed break to rejuvenate, recharge my batteries in readiness for the autumn term.

Early on at the start of going into business, one thing that Peter Thomson, business development specialist of Pti International said at one of his seminars was when planning for the year ahead, the first thing that should go in your diary is your holiday. Make planning your holiday and time out for you and your family a priority over the business. So true! This is what I do at the start of every year, even if I don’t know what we will be doing or where we will be going, the time gets booked out in the diary first.

Have you planned your holiday or time out yet?

Enjoy this blog and have a great summer break

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer

Follow me on Twitter www.twitter.com/EasyTigerParents
______________________________________________________________________

Schools & Other Newsletters

Do you want to share this blog in your own newsletter, blog or website?

I have had requests from schools & others about including my articles in their own newsletters.

Schools and other readers may do so, providing the article remains intact and you credit the author (me) and include the following credits with it:

Jennifer McLeod’s mission is to liberate parents, families and young people and is the Creator of Easy Tiger Parent System™ and Born To Win! Programme For Young People. To subscribe to her free email newsletter and get access to top tips, visit http://www.jennifer-mcleod.blogspot.com/ or email parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk

____________________________________________________________________

Mobile Phone Directory launches next week

A new Mobile Phone Directory launches next week.

I have grave concerns about implications and safeguarding issues for children and young people with adults and youngsters being able to get their mobile numbers from this directory. For others to be able to access your mobile phones in this way has far reaching implications than the normal landline.

If you haven’t already done so, click on the link below to unsubscribe your mobile phone, if you wish.

http://www.118800.co.uk/removeme/remove-me.htmlhttp://www.118800.co.uk/removeme/remove-me.html

Or check out further information about the directory here
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/working_lunch/8091621.stm
At the time of writing this article, the http://www.118800.co.uk/ website had been offline for couple days and the service is now ‘suspended for improvements’. Hhhmm? Quite a convenient time for the service to be offline or suspended when people are attempting to unsubscribe before the launch!

The Communications Officer might have given her consent for this service, but she didn’t ask us and my service provider didn’t seek my permission to release my mobile number.
I have contacted Central ITV news about this (they didn’t know anything about it either!) and a friend of mine has contacted Ed Doolan of Radio West Midlands (WM). If you feel as strongly as we do about this service, then please take some form of action to prevent it being launched or used.

Although it is offline now, I think we still need to be vigilant. Please let me know if you discover that it is back online. Thank you.
_____________________________________________________________________

Featured # Article: Get Selfish!

When I work with parents as part of my Easy Tiger Parents Programme, I use a term I call “positive selfishness”, whereby I encourage parents to focus on themselves. For instance, a parent that I have worked with has two children, one is attention seeking and the other is hyperactive. The parents are arguing and there is tension in the home. The parents focus is for me to give them tools and solutions to manage their children’s behaviour. My response is to work with the parents to manage their own emotions/challenges (behaviour), bringing about a calmer atmosphere and environment in the house, which in itself, will help to put their children at ease and be more re-assured and self assured.

If you focus your attention on loving you, or learning to love yourself, nurturing you, feeding yourself with the correct food and knowledge, supporting you, respecting you, giving to you, then you are in a better position to attend to others around you and their needs, including your children.

How can you love others?

How can you love others if you don’t love or know how to love yourself? How can you truly respect others if you don’t know how to respect yourself? Loving yourself could well mean starting from scratch to learn to love yourself, as I did, especially if you hadn’t learnt this from your parents. So be it, start right there.

One parent thought that this sounded a bit like a cliché but then realised it was indeed what was needed in order to change the situation and circumstances in her home. She was so focused on what her husband was/was not doing that she missed what she was/was not doing and this in itself created more of the friction at home.

Some people tend to project outwards and want to ‘fix’ everyone else or blame everyone else for what’s going on and going wrong in their lives. This is sadly, exactly the same for some parents. These parents find it far easier to focus on the children’s behaviour rather than admit that it’s their own ‘stuff’ that’s creating the situation, circumstances and environment that the children react to, ‘act out’, and children are then labelled by parents, schools and others as ‘naughty’, ‘misbehaving’ a ‘trouble maker’ or ‘always up to no good’. Children and young people who self harm are also reacting to their conditions and environments.

Parents’ and others projecting outwards is the problem! If we, as parents and adults stopped and stepped back to focus more on ourselves and look inwards, we wouldn’t need to do a lot of mopping up and attempting to fix the children!

Disheartening

I get disheartened when some parents opt out of the process when they realise that the focus needs to be more on them than on the children. It is far easier and more comfortable to treat the whole situation as a problem with the kids. Ok, I accept that some parents may not be ready to deal with their emotional ‘stuff’/baggage or Emotional Roadblocks™, and that we are all at our own stage of development, however, what happens to the children in the meantime when the parent does nothing at all to deal with their ‘stuff’? It’s all about taking a small step! And I actively encourage parents to take small steps especially if they are just starting out on their journey of development or discovery.

When my eldest son started having constant stomach pains/crams at the age of about 5, resulting form tension at home between me and his dad, this was my trigger to do something about the relationship, myself and make some life changing, yet very difficult decisions.

We teach others how to treat us. Likewise, when we project our problems and ‘stuff’ outwards, we are really teaching our children to blame other people for their problems, aren’t we? If this is the case, how can we therefore tell our children to ‘take responsibility for your behaviour’?

After my divorce and alongside horrible experiences at work, I used to mediate for roughly 10 – 15 minutes as soon as I got home from work. I know that my children experienced a much better, calmer and balanced mum than if I had not taken those few minutes out.

Learning “positive selfishness” is what took me out of my unhealthy and abusive situations in the past, so that I could offer my children a lot more than I had and a better perspective on life.

Spiritual hour

‘Positive selfishness’ is not self conceitedness and focuses on creating and finding a balance in mind, body and soul. I strongly recommend that parents create and take ‘me time’ or ‘spiritual hour’ for themselves to recharge their batteries, relax, unwind and rejuvenate so that they come back to the children in a much calmer & healthier state of mind. This helps to prevent children being shouted at or being blamed for ‘stuff’ that really belongs to their parents.

Now over to you!

Q: What would need to happen in order for you to change one small thing, that if you did, it would make a huge difference to your children and family life?

This article © Jennifer McLeod 2009. All Rights Reserved

____________________________________________________________________

What’s On?


The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course – Young People

Thank You to all practitioners working with young people who attended May 2009 Self Harm & Behaviour Course. The Course was hugely oversubscribed and proved to be very popular. We even had people contacting us up to 1 day before start of the course. Thank you also for those that forwarded the course information and recommended it to others. Much appreciated!

Here’s what some of the delegates had to say about the Course:

“The Course has given me confidence to perhaps speak out and state concerns about a child who may be self harming”
Anita Rankin, Yarlswood Immigration Centre

“I am aware of different perspectives of people that self harm and understanding the background behaviour that could prevent this.”
Michelle Tennant, Hatchford Primary School

“Inspirational and down to earth!” Janice Costley, Lode Heath School

“Made me feel more confident that my approach is appropriate when working with children and young people.”
Godfrey Tomlinson, Family Support Team, Birmingham City Council

“Fantastic! Great to know lots of techniques to start using to help children to be more aware.”
Alice Hanlon, Colmers School

“I am aware of what self harm is. It is not attention seeking. Very relevant in my current role with young people.”
Bernie Flynn, West Midlands Police

Our next Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course for practitioners working with young people will be taking place Tuesday 18 May 2010. Please put this date in your diary and watch out for further information & joining instructions later on in the year.

____________________________________

The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course – for Women/Men

We have also had requests from some of you about a Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course for women/men.

This could be adults who are self harming or practitioners working with adults who are self harming.

As such, a new Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course will be taking place Tuesday 24 November 2009 in Birmingham, UK.

We are taking bookings for this course now and further information will be sent out shortly.

______________________________________

Easy Tiger Parents System™

For further information and to book Easy Tiger Parents Programmes for your organisation/company, contact me at parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk

‘Jennifer taught me that for me to create a happier environment, I need to be happy within myself. I can use exercises, that are fantastic, and I’m automatically going to walk out of here with my head held high!
This Course has helped me to look at my life so much more positively and different and if I ever get down, there are so many exercises that I can do. The Course is like a breath of fresh air! It has shown me how to change negative thinking into positive thinking and by doing that I’m calmer and feel a much stronger person completely.’
Sonya, Burnt Tree Children’s Centre Parent

_________________________________

Born To Win! Programme For Young People

For further information and to book Born To Win! Programme For Young People contact me at youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk

'The Born To Win! Workshop was a very good Workshop. It offered helpful advice and is refreshing to learn. The Speaker was Brill! ‘Born To Win!’ is like a stepping stone to your future.’
Jemma, Student at Stourbridge College

_______________________________

Born To Win! Ebook

I will finally be launching my Born To Win! Ebook that you can buy online at the click of a button.

Watch this space for more information shortly.


FEEDBACK and Comments about this Blog?
I always welcome any feedback you may have. Add your comments about this article here.

Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6lf3gj

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

Born To Win! Success Strategies - EBOOK. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/66hovs

Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
Creator of Born To Win! Programme for Young People™

E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
E: youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk
www.stepup-international.co.uk
+44 (0) 121 551 1668

The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course

The Psychology of Self Harm and Behaviour Course
Wednesday 13 May 2009

“The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course raised awareness of issues and offered strategies for dealing with these.”
Carol Kenny, Queen Mary’s High School

Do you often wonder why….?

ð More young people are getting confused and ‘acting out’?
ð Some children and young people self harm?
ð Some children and young people behave in a particular way and don’t seem to be able to break the habit?
ð Suicide is on the increase amongst young people?
ð Some young people appear to be apathetic?
ð Seemingly very intelligent young people throw their opportunities away and end up mixing with the wrong crowd, getting pregnant or get into debilitating habits like drug taking, alcohol or joining gangs?

This 1 Day Course will cover:
Ö An awareness of the underlying emotional and psychological challenges, patterns and beliefs that might be running young people’s lives.
Ö How our inner world has a major impact on our outer world and the people around us
Ö Letting go of negative emotions
Ö Interpreting Positive intentions relating to self harm behaviour
Ö Possible signs to look out for
Ö How YOU can have a great positive impact on children and the young people that you work with and manage self harm differently
Ö How your communication can make the difference to young people
Ö Tools, strategies for support and change of self harm behaviour

“The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course helped me to feel inspired again! It reinforced what my role is and how I can make a positive difference. It was great that you shared your experience with us, which added credence and authenticity to what you were saying. I feel more able to delve deeper and confident in dealing with self harm.”
Julia Clarke, St Paul’s RC School

The emphasis of this Course is on the emotional and psychological issues that precedes the actual self harm activity.

It takes YOU on a journey of discovering and uncovering the awareness of issues and circumstances that may trigger self harm activities in young people.

Additionally, the Course provides delegates with effective tools and strategies to support young people in dealing with self harm

“It has given me some practical strategies in order to work with pupils who self harm, and I now have a greater understanding of why pupils ‘self harm’”
Maureen Davis, St John Wall School

Finally, included in The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course are modules for you as a professional to identify how you can support yourself and parents better and differently within self harm and other aspects of your work with young people.

DATE: Wednesday 13 May 2009
Investment: £177 (Recession buster - £31 discount off 2008 price!!!)
Venue: Central Birmingham, B5
Time: 09.30 – 4.00pm
Complimentary Breakfast & Lunch and refreshments will be provided.

WHO SHOULD ATTEND?

Anyone working with children and young people, including:
Ö Teachers
Ö Social Workers
Ö Youth Workers
Ö LEA (Local Education Authority) staff
Ö Foster Carers
Ö Extended School Staff
Ö Child Protection Teams
Ö Probation Officers; Prison Officers
Ö Family Support Workers
Ö Connexions Staff
Ö Primary Care Trust
Ö Residential Staff
Ö Learning Mentors/Mentor
Ö Teaching Assistants/Support Staff
Ö C.A.M.S Staff

For further information contact Jennifer McLeod on
+44 (0) 121 551 1668 or email youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk.

What do you do now?

Contact us now youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk to book your place Today!

This is on a first come first served basis only and delegates who have paid will have their places secured.

** Places are limited. Please book your place now to avoid disappointment**


“The Psychology of Self Harm & Behaviour Course has given me fresh insight and strategies to use and to know what to look out for. Thank you so much. I was very inspired by what you do and useful to hear about your own personal experiences.”
Jan Loxley, Primrose Hill Community School

Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6lf3gj

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

Born To Win! Success Strategies - EBOOK. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/66hovs

Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
Creator of Born To Win! Programme for Young People™

E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
E: youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk
www.stepup-international.co.uk
+44 (0) 121 551 1668

Featured Article: #1
Giving Your Children Focused Attention
By Jennifer McLeod

As parents living in a fast paced society, it is so easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of life, concern ourselves with all the chores that need to be done and give what little time we have left to our children.

“Quality time” means different things to different people. Giving just five minutes ‘quality time’ to children isn’t the answer and doesn’t go very far in meeting children’s needs. All children need real time from their parents, not just to make them feel special, however, also a natural part of the nurturing, development, secure relationship building, guidance and supportive processes that parents need to provide.

Recently, I took some downtime, which also allowed me to immerse myself in to some chores around the house. Taking this downtime made me wonder how on earth I manage my busy schedule, a home and make time for the children. It’s a case of prioritising. And no I don’t always get it right! However, it’s about having the focus to make your children a priority in your life because no one else will do this for you, unless of course you have a nanny that takes care of their practical needs, but this in no way replaces the love and attention that children need and deserve from their own parents. Time flies by so quickly these days that before you know it, your children have reached the age of 16 and able to make some of their own decisions which includes leaving the family home.

Children and young people need to know that you love them and they need to see and experience this behaviourally rather than just auditory, i.e. what you say. That is, you need to show your children that you love them, and not just tell them!

So how do you give your children focused attention?

¨ Hug your children!
Big and small, old and young, they all still need to be hugged. And they are still your children irrespective of how old they are. Hugging your children is so much easier when they are young children. Hugging your teenagers, on the other hand, is an art in itself. This is one of those occasions where you need to tread carefully as your teens go through an interesting, challenging, frustrating and confusing phase in their lives. Make it easier for both of you by following your teens lead. For instance, not hugging them in front of their friends unless they instigate it, nor outside of school.

Don’t make the mistake, however, of thinking that your children do not need a hug. We all do! Don’t you just feel so much better, connected and loved when someone gives you a hug? Just because your teenager is not approaching you for a hug, does not mean that they do not need one. They will be following your lead and it takes courage to take the first step, especially if there is an element of hostility between you.

Also, be willing to say sorry and apologise to your teen if you need to. It’s amazing how many barriers that the word ‘sorry’ can break down, don’t you think?

An alternative to hugging your teen, depending on how receptive they are to your hugs, is a simple touch or pat on the head, shoulders, knees, or back will suffice to show your teen that you love them. This can even be done as you walk past them, which might get a few grunts a long the way from you teen, but don’t let up on physical contact.

One parent that I have recently worked with as part of my Easy Tiger Parent System™, said that she had no problems hugging and being playful with her 3 year old. However, she only hugs her 10 year old at bedtime.

Whilst her 10 year old might not be moaning or saying anything about not being hugged at other times, she will be very aware that her sibling is getting a lot more hugs and her parents attention that she is and, at a psychological level and to make sense of it, may blame herself for her parents not hugging her as much.

I appreciate some parents may find hugging difficult especially if they were not shown affection by their parents as a child. I fell into that category too, however, I made the decision that it would be different for my children.


¨ Give them loving eye contact
Give your children eye contact when you are communicating with them. It sounds such a simple thing to do, yet it is so easy to be so busy whilst talking to your children that you focus on what you are busy doing that you don’t realise that you are not making eye contact. I’ve done it too. What do we say to our children when we are talking to them and they are looking every where else but at us? That’s right! ‘Look at me when I am talking to you1’. And where do they get that behaviour from? That’s right, probably you.

Additionally, give your children loving eye contact generally and not just give them eye contact when you are telling them off.

¨ Loving discipline
All children need boundaries and discipline which, as responsible parents, we provide them with for a healthy, balanced and positive childhood.

Boundaries are necessary guidelines to help your children to manage and self regulate themselves and their environment. Children and young people who are not given boundaries lose self control and look to their peers to plug the gap and fill that need. Even young people who argue vehemently about boundaries and restrictions, need boundaries and in the long run, will be grateful for them being in place and enforced.

I recently heard of a young person who was in tears because her parents didn’t give her any boundaries to guide her growth and development. She is wishing they had. And yes, it is a fine line between giving children and young people too much latitude and being too restrictive.

Having sound values that you are clear about as a parent and shared with the family, in line with your goals for your family, will help you to identify where you stand regarding boundaries. I appreciate that for some people whose own childhood experiences may prove to be challenging and perhaps cast doubts on their ability to identify clear values and therefore healthy boundaries. To them I would say simply make them up! Having some boundaries is better than having none at all. As time goes on, monitor, review and adjust them to what feels or looks just right for you.

Sometimes our parents’ values don’t always serve our purpose as adults and parents in our own right. So take control of your life and do your own thing. Do what feels right for your family.

Loving discipline helps children and young people to learn about what is right or wrong and to develop responsibility and accountability for their actions. This is in the form of natural consequences of their behaviour and not necessarily punishment for their behaviour. I have to say that it took me a while to get clear about the difference between consequences and punishment, I guess because I only ever had punishment as a child. So an example of a natural consequence is when one of my sons left his blazer at school because it had a rip in it and expecting that it would just be replaced. He had a shock when I told him that he had to replace the blazer using his own money. As apposed to punishing him by maybe grounding him say for a week. There is no direct correlation here with what he has done, and potentially the punishment could cause confusion.

Other healthy options of consequences can take many forms e.g. applying restrictions to teenager’s movements, whether this means being sent to their room or prevented from going out for days or a week. Clearly the discipline needs to be age related.

Whilst being a parent can be a thankless ‘job’ at the best of times, we owe it to our children to do everything possible to create secure relationships with them. That could well involve doing what we need to do to develop ourselves to make it happen.


Go and enjoy hugging your children, giving them loving eye contact and loving discipline.

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Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6lf3gj

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

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Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
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E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
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www.stepup-international.co.uk
+44 (0) 121 551 1668

Knife victim Damilola Taylor speaks to the Prime Minister

Knife victim Damilola Taylor speaks to the Prime Minister

"I will travel far and wide to choose my destiny to remould the world. I know it is my destiny to defend the world which I hope to achieve in my lifetime".
Damilola Taylor, a small boy with a huge vision! He wrote this at the age of 10.

Well, he doesn’t exactly speak to the Prime Minister! Damilola Taylor’s father, Richard Taylor does as the government’s special envoy on youth violence and knife crime.

As you all may remember, Damilola was a victim of knife crime at the age of 11 in 2000.

Richard Taylor’s role includes working with other victim’s families to identify ways of changing young people’s behaviour and attitudes.

As such, Richard wants to hear from YOU. Let him know your views on what underpins youth violence and what we can do to eradicate it. Share your views directly with Richard Taylor and Gordon Brown at The Damilola Taylor Trust website http://www.damilolataylortrust.com/ or email info@damilolataylortrust.com

This is your opportunity to have direct access to Gordon Brown and tell him what you think about supporting our young people, our future.

For me personally, one of the main challenges that I see young people facing is the constant negative press, negative messages and labelling that they are receiving from adults and society as a whole. Just look at any news headlines regarding young people and see what you think. A most recent example was when we had the snow and young people were doing exactly the same as we did back in our days – snow ball ‘fights’. However, today, young people are labelled as exhibiting ‘anti-social behaviour’ for snow ball ‘fights!’ Is it any wonder that they react negatively?

I would like to see us get to a stage as a nation where we can allow young people ‘free play’ and have more facilities for them to do so. By that I mean that they have facilities for free outdoor activities similar to children’s play areas where they are allowed to ‘free play’ without being supervised by police or youth workers. For instance, skateboarding facilities.

Let me know your thoughts, and most importantly tell Gordon Brown what you think via Richard Taylor.

Although Damilola did not achieve his vision in his lifetime, he can achieve it through you in his memory.

“The bumblebee’s wings are so thin and its body so big, it should not be able to fly. The only problem is, the bee doesn’t know that!”
David Lindsey

Take a leaf out of Damilola’s book and decide on your vision today and act like a bumble bee to achieve it!

Follow me on Twitter at www.twitter.com/JenniferMcLeod see what is going on and let me know your thoughts. It is free for you to join and set up your own account

Have you been LiBERATED yet?

NEW LIFE! NEW FREEDOM! NEW YOU!

With Inspirational Blessings
Jennifer McLeod

Born To Win! book Series:

Born To Win! Live Your Ultimate Life Vision Today. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6lf3gj

Born To Win! Success Strategies for Young Businesses and New Entrepreneurs. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/6x6u9t

Born To Win! Success Strategies - EBOOK. Get your copy here: http://tinyurl.com/66hovs

Creator of Easy Tiger Parents System™
Creator of Born To Win! Programme for Young People™

E: parent@jennifermcleod.co.uk
E: youngpeople@jennifermcleod.co.uk

+44 (0) 121 551 1668